Thursday, May 08, 2008

shooting blind

shooting blind
Originally uploaded by valcox

Oh I wish I could get a straight answer to a straight question when I need it. It should have been easy enough. Rush was invited to his first Bar Mitzvah, I know the parents well enough. What I don't know are the gift customs for this Jewish celebration, but I'm quite certain it's possible to do things wrong, very wrong. So I figure a phone call will answer my question.

So I call, hoping Stephanie answers the phone. "Hello?" (not Stephanie) :"Hi Peter, this is Val, Rush's mom, maybe you can answer my question". I heem and haw and finally blurt it out--but it doesn't go exactly as I expect. He politely leaves me with no answers just that Stephanie will call me back. Then I beg that he forgets I called, no reason to get Stephanie involved (and likely go through the same thing)

Now if someone, who didn't have such answers, called and asked me what someone should bring to a standard Methodist-
Mormon-Southern Baptist home birthday party for a teenager. I could answer that question. A $20. bill. All the kids do it, cards are optional. But do it wrong, and bring a gift or gift-card, and it will be noticed. That's easy, ask and I'll tell you the way it is.

I don't really care what the 'answer' is, just give me a hint, and all will be good.

1 comment:

Val Cox said...

Yea, my friend Nina to the rescue. She wasn't able to post, but gave me this:

"The tradition is a Bar Mitzvah card with a check for multiples of $18. The tradition is that 18 is a lucky number for Jewish people. So if you give $36 it is called “double chai”, or double good luck. $54 is “triple chai” etc. I suggest you give what is most realistic and comfortable for you, as this becomes part of what my Mom called the gift tax. If your son is invited to many of these it can become something you resent, rather than a pleasure to give. Good luck with this dilemma."